Monthly Archives: March 2009

I’ll Stick with Breastfeeding, Thanks!

I have to admit, I’m very fortunate. Breastfeeding is once again going quite smoothly for me. It’s one of those areas where I’ve not had serious problems. It’s a bit of effort to get started, occasionally painful, physically exhausting at times, but really not bad at all.

I know I’m quite fortunate.

Selene is one of those babies who just took a look in the hospital and just latched right on. No hesitation from that girl! She didn’t master the right latch immediately, but did well enough to quickly get milk.

Our one problem these days is that I produce well enough that she can be a lazy nurser at times. We should all have such problems, right?

I have to be pretty firm with her about that, though, as when she gets lazy she can leave me in pain. Poor latch at those times, and just enough stimulation to really get that milk production flowing.

She’s also one of those kids who falls asleep halfway through a feeding, then wakes up a half hour later wanting more. Sweet rascal is a pretty deep sleeper after a feed, and so far I can’t wake her up to finish the job with any consistency, at least not if I’m being gentle with her.

I’m just starting pumping these days so that she can learn to take a bottle. No formula needed in this house. But I do like to be able to run errands with NO children along. Nearest thing I get to a break most of the time. Showing off the baby is fun, but there comes a time when you just want to get things done by yourself and not have random strangers talking to you, even about a favorite topic.

The convenience and money saved is nice too. I know what formula costs, and must say I am very glad to not need to be paying for that! Pumping supplies cost a little, but especially since I have the pump from my other babies, pumping breastmilk isn’t much of an expense at all.

Overall, I love the connection created by breastfeeding. There’s a reason why I put up with the long nights, occasional pain, and chronic exhaustion. How can I not enjoy having those little eyes staring into mine as she gets started each time?

But some don’t feel so good about breastfeeding, particularly Hanna Rosin in her article “The Case Against Breastfeeding”. She sees it as not so feminist and not as beneficial as most people in the medical industry say.

Honestly, I think the problem is more about division of labor than breastfeeding. I’ve always thought formula feeding would be more inconvenient. All the preparation and cleanup involved. Maybe I’m too lazy to formula feed.

I certainly don’t consider breastfeeding to be a problem for a feminist. It’s a genuine difference between men and women. And if you’re really determined and your body cooperates, you can work while breastfeeding.

I do so at home. Two of my sisters did it while working outside the home, for about a year with each of their kids.

Even though I’m at home, I want workplaces to make more accommodations for women who are breastfeeding. It’s not that complex. A place that isn’t a bathroom set aside for pumping is ideal, if not possible for all businesses. A reasonable attitude toward the time it takes a mother to pump is also quite helpful.

That’s the part of breastfeeding that is relevant to feminism. The more comfortable it is for a mother to provide breast milk for her baby while at work, the easier it becomes for her to choose to work after starting a family.

The United States is well behind other countries in both maternity and paternity leave. Too many jobs are quite simply not family friendly at all.

No, being more family friendly won’t cause all women to breastfeed. It just doesn’t work out for everyone, for a variety of reasons. But giving up shouldn’t be about your work.

I know some will say that I’m biased, as working from home does make breastfeeding easier than trying to do it from outside the home. That’s true enough. But given all the benefits to both mother and child of breastfeeding, I’m firmly on the side of making it more possible. One less reason for women to give up careers they love. One less reason for employers to lose great employees.

Is It Safe to Let Your Kids Go Free Range?

I read an article yesterday that got me thinking again about free range kids. A mom let her 10 year old son walk 1/3 of a mile to the park, but he was stopped by the police and brought home. The officer claimed she was endangering him by allowing him to walk so far alone.

In a quiet, generally safe neighborhood.

Thank goodness the Chief of Police, when contacted, disagreed with what the officer had done.

My kids aren’t yet of an age that I’ll let them go free range. The older two are 4 and 6, and I already know that my 6 year old will still run out into the street without looking for cars first. That’s one of my big criteria for letting her do things like walk alone to school.

I strongly approve of letting children roam in age appropriate ways. It’s important for their development and self confidence.

Kids in my area are definitely walking home from school on their own by 10 years old. It’s a nice neighborhood, and certainly safe enough even for kids a bit younger than that to walk home alone. Heck, I was walking home with my older sisters when I was in preschool, and my oldest sister was just 3 years older than I was. There were some other daycare kids too, but I don’t know their ages. Just that no grown ups were involved.

Despite what some people think, the world hasn’t gotten more dangerous. We are significantly more aware of the dangers, and that’s a big part of why parents are so fearful of letting their children roam.

Think about it. We can look online and see maps of where registered sex offenders are living. We hear stories from across the nation about children being snatched, sometimes in broad daylight. It’s so easy to hear about the worst that can happen that it’s hard to recognize how rare it is.

My kids are starting to get a little more freedom, mostly due to the kids next door. The oldest ones there are old enough to supervise the others in the front yard. None of them roam like I did at their ages though, at least so far as I see.

They also get to roam ahead of me when we walk to school or go hiking. It’s a very small freedom, but it means they can explore at a bit more of their own pace rather than waiting for me or my husband to point things out to them.

No, letting your kids go free range isn’t completely safe. Nothing is. Accidents can happen no matter how careful you are.

But kids need to learn how to be responsible and confident when they are out on their own. You don’t want your kids to be adults who are afraid to do anything alone. You want them to be confident and competent. The way to develop those skills is to give them little freedoms as they grow and teach them how to do things on their own safely.

Loving the Handmedowns

We took a little trip this weekend up to my sister’s house. Not a big drive, it would have just been an hour if it weren’t for the non-injury accident that shut the freeway down to one lane on our way up there. Took us an hour just to get through that point.

But the trip was worth it. We have the handmedowns for Selene now. Bags of clothes that my sister’s daughter has outgrown, our old Exersaucer that we had handed down to her, and a dance pad game that she no longer wants that our older two are having a blast with. Plus a few other random supplies.

It’s the wonderful part about my sisters and I having our families in so much the same time frame. Tons and tons of stuff has gone through 4 girls already, and has now been handed down to the fifth.

I love that about baby clothes. Most get worn so little that they can go through a lot of kids. Each cycle the most worn out ones are cycled out, but that still leaves a ton of baby clothes that we’re reusing. Hardly anything new is needed at this point.

Although I must say it’s really hard to resist all the cute clothes when I pass by the baby department at Target. Baby girl clothes are just so cute! But so far I’ve been good.

Time to Get My Garden Growing!

I love this time of year. Time to get out to the garden center and figure out what we are growing this year.

We buy a combination of seeds and already started plants. Seeds are of course cheaper, but it’s nice to have some things growing already. Some plants we just never seem to have any luck with if we start from seed.

Hopefully things will go better this year than last year. For some reason last year’s garden was not terribly productive. Just one of those things, I guess.

We bought some tomato plants, two kinds of lettuce, broccoli and basil already started. The basil is for the herb garden we’ll be planting out front. I suggested to my husband that we get a cherry tomato or other small variety for out there, since basil and tomatoes grow well together. The kids play out front pretty regularly with friends, and a small tomato is something I think they would enjoy being allowed to snack on. My kids like to eat fresh basil too.

We also have lots of seeds. Green beans, sugar snap peas, corn, cucumbers, zucchini and more. We really have to get those into the seed pots.

We let the kids pick out some plants to grow too. My daughter wanted snap dragons. My son picked out nasturtiums. I saved some egg cartons for them to start their seeds in. We’ll see what grows.

The kids are always much involved in the garden. They love it.

As the plants grow, we teach them what they may and may not pick freely. Most things they have to ask for, but some things are grown more for their enjoyment. The trick is teaching them to not overeat the herbs. Somehow they start forgetting to ask on those. Our poor fennel last year hardly made any progress due to hungry children. It attracts butterflies, so we really want it to get big.

This is the time when the compost pile can really pay off. We think my husband got the mix wrong last year (too much compost) and that might be why things didn’t work out then, so this year he’s going to try changing the mix a little. And of course last year’s mix is probably in much better shape this year for growing, as things should have broken down still further.

Our focus is very much on growing things that can reduce our food bills. A good garden can save a lot of money despite the initial investment, and we want that to be the case this year.

My one concern is the potential for water restrictions. I’ll gladly let the lawn go in exchange for a good garden. Frankly, I think the front one in particular should be switched out for some xeriscaping. Done right it would save a lot of water and look really nice. I’ve seen some good examples around the neighborhood.

Now if I could just convince the landlord to do it, and their yard guys to leave it alone! The yard guys are kind of random about removing plants they think don’t belong. We’ve had things we’ve put in stay put for months, then suddenly get pulled. That’s why I don’t want to do it myself. I’m too concerned that the money we put in might be wasted if I don’t catch these guys in time to warn them off. If only they’d pull the weeds in the front lawn with so much enthusiasm!

Figuring Out Personal Care Products

I came across a very interesting article over on WebMD about the toxins in consumer products. Many people use products that have these in them every day.

Some are pointless at best, such as your typical antibacterial soaps. According to the article, the amount of antibacterial products in household soaps and such are not strong enough to kill the bacteria. Instead, they may only be helping create stronger bacteria.

Regular soaps do the job just as well in most cases. You’re better off avoiding products with triclosan in them. It’s really not helping you, and may be causing environmental damage.

Parabens and phthalates are also all too common. These two act like hormones in your body. Phthalates are hard to spot, as they hide under the name “fragrance”. Parabens are easier to spot as “paraben” will be a part of the word in the ingredient list.

When in doubt, the Skin Deep website is a huge help. It will help you to figure out which products are safer for you. You’ll be able to make more educated purchases for all sorts of personal care products for yourself and your family.